Today was the first day that I have really gone back and read through Bailey's Journey from beginning to end. I have tried in the past but have never been "strong" enough to make it without breaking down in tears and having to stop. I admit that I found tears streaming down my face from time to time today, too, but I made it through. I have been talking with some ladies who are currently pregnant with babies diagnosed with TD and wanted to go back through and compare my situation with what they are going through currently. Although we didn't know Bailey had TD while in utero, there is so much now that I can see the same as what these ladies babies have right now. I also pulled out all of Bailey's ultrasound records and looked at them and read the letters from the perinatal specialists to my OB. Is it weird to read through and relive everything? Maybe. But I think it is a part of healing, too.
Although I questioned starting this blog I am so very glad that I did. I am glad that I have record for the future of our thoughts and feelings - everything we went through as we waited to get our sweet daughter here.
I am also so grateful to have all of the wonderful words of kindness from all of our great friends and family. I have a book I am putting together FULL of letters and emails from people from all across the US. Some are friends we have known a long time, relatives from near and far ... others are friends of a friend of a friend that we have never met but, yet, were a part of Bailey's life in their own way. She was a very loved little girl and we are so lucky that we had so much support throughout our journey to get her here. I truly know that all the prayers on our behalf helped us get through what seemed at times unbearable.
We love you all! Thank you - we could never repay you for your love and kindness.
4 years ago